Many people want to know whether the Richards family is now complete… in truth, we dont know…
When Phil and I first met, he wanted to have eight children…EIGHT!!! By the time we got married, that number was down to four. And then, while we were expecting Keatynn, we decided that life would be very simple and much easier if we just stuck to having our two girls. The thought of being pregnant again while in my third trimester of pregnancy was just too much to bare.
And then Keatynn was born, and I couldn’t stand the thought of this being the last time I had a hospital stay that related to babies. I cried when we packed her up into our car and brought her home. I cried every time we talked about the fact that she was our last and we would never experience this tiny baby phase again. Hormones certainly played a role in me wearing my heart on my sleeve like this… but I just felt so strongly that we were not done! …and Phil felt the complete opposite!
It was a challenge, I knew that eventually we would have to be on the same page with this – I couldn’t live the rest of our lives desperately wanting another baby and Phil saying no. So I prayed. I prayed that God would bring us to a point of agreement, either way. That He would change our hearts and that we would make this decision together.
God is so faithful! After one of our many baby related chats, Phil came out of a very long shower and declared that another child would be a real blessing and if God would choose to bless us with a bigger family, he would be ready to embrace that.
It’s funny, because as soon as the decision to have another baby was so real, I wasn’t sure I could cope with more.My days are FULL with the girls! Half the time I feel as though I am barely coping with them, that my capacity has been met. Never mind another two! You see, for us, it is either two or four… there is no middle man.
And then I remember that my capacity comes fully from God and that should He choose to bless us with more, He will also give me the tolerance, energy and a peace in having more children – just as He has given me as we have adjusted from zero to one and then to two.
So now, we go back and forth between two and four and what would be best for us, for our girls, for our family. And we really don’t know! Some days I have the desire to have more and on others, I am completely content with my girls. Will the Richards family grow some more? …The master plan for now, is to keep seeking God… that is it really… until we know.